EDSA Is Robbing Me of Family Time

happypinaymommy — Thu, 12 Mar 2015 14:23:25 +0000

Does your daily commute take a toll on your family time? you are not alone. Photo credits: Roy Patrick Tan Via Flickr.com

Whether you drive your own car or take public transportation to and from your office, most Metro-Manila based working moms have one sentiment — the heavy traffic is taking a toll on their personal time.

EDSA Traffic has become too heavy that it makes headline news, and would even comprise all stories in the first gap of early evening news programs. And while it would have been a different story if the dashing Atom Araullo is the one reporting, one thing remains – the traffic flow is just sooo frustrating.

My former officemate even said “hindi ka pa nagsastart magtrabaho stressed-out ka na.” And why not? You just spent the whole morning hurrying up to leave your house, and then spend the next one-and a half to two hours plying EDSA looking for alternate routes, or, lining up at the MRT patiently waiting for your turn to enter one of the few working bagons. Come 5 PM, you rinse and repeat the whole process.

So now what?

Moms now have in their smartphone apps that advise them about traffic flow. But hello? Do you have a choice? When you work in Makati and live in Quezon City you only have three sensible routes to choose from: EDSA, C-5, or the Manila Route that would rival the isaw being sold at your neighborhood barbecue-han. All three routes are jampacked as soon as the clock strikes 4:30.

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So what do moms do? If they can afford, and their bosses don’t mind, they become members of the HONDA Group (lucky for me XB is like this). And no this is not a group of mothers driving the same vehicle brand. This is a group of mothers leaving HONDA-dot. Much like members of Club 501, I mentioned in this post. By doing so, they avoid at least 15 minutes of heavy traffic because as we all know, not all employees can afford to leave on-the-dot.

Anyway, going back to the sentiment about EDSA robbing me of my family time, I earlier thought that I might just be over-reacting to it and that traffic is really a way of life here in the metropolis. But I found out I am not alone. Most moms like me shudder at the thought that their four-hour back and forth commute could have been spent helping the children with their assignments, or cuddling with them in the morning. It could have been spent with the husband via a date night in the couch. Pero wala ng movies o nice shows, kasi A & A or worst puro UFC nalang ang maabutan mo sa sobrang traffic!

And when we get home, we realize that we are not just robbed of time, we are also robbed of the energy to be the patient and cheerful mom that we have to be. That is if the kids are still awake when we get home.

So what am I getting into? This is not a hate post for MMDA Chairman Tolentino. I am definitely not a fan, but I know the man is doing what he can. What can you do when you only have two major highways to service that voluminous amount of cars right? All I am saying is we, mothers should put matters into our own hands. Maybe we could study the option of moving houses near our work (not that easy but not impossible), we can find another job nearer to our place of residence, or we could start considering work from home options. And whether we decide to stay or move on, there is one thing we should do, shrug that mommy guilt off because we are just doing what’s best for our families.

Hug the kids again, and till next post!

Photo credits: Roy Patrick Tan Via Flickr.com

The post EDSA Is Robbing Me of Family Time appeared first on Happy Pinay Mommy.

The Travails of Doctor T, a Full-Time Pinay Working Mom

happypinaymommy — Tue, 08 Apr 2014 04:39:00 +0000

A Sneak Peek in the Struggles of a pinay working mom. (Photo Credits)

Little and I went to her dental check up. Her pediatric dentist, Dr. T, was easy to talk to, not to mention, very pleasant. (UPDATE: Ladies, Doctor T is not the doctor i mentioned in this post that quoted P70K for my daughter’s dental treatment, as an update to this post, Doctor T now operates her own clinic in her hometown. The pedo i am referring to is the pedo in another dental clinic we went when Doctor T. left her old practice.) Anyway, in our four visits, we immediately had a connection over mommyhood, especially since little and her kid are of the same age.

Of Preschool Teachers and a Pinay Working Mom

This visit however was different. As she shared infos about her daughter’s graduation and all, we suddenly touched into the topic most pinay working moms, dare not discuss. She mentioned to me that her daughter’s teacher in pre-school suggested that she personally take care of her child as her daughter showed disinterest in school in the latter part of the school year. The teacher mentioned that “if she was the one who is personally taking care of her daughter, the daughter may not have went through such phase.”

(Post continued below)

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You may also want to read:

EDSA is robbing me of Family Time

What a Pinay Mommy Can do while She is Stuck in Traffic

A busy Mom’s Guide to Daily Meal Preparation

Legitimate Websites that Provide Work From Home Opportunities

Real ways for housewives to earning extra income from home

All about Cloth Diapering

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As a working mom (at that time), I thought that the comment was unfair, and I pointed it out to her. I told her in the nicest way that although the teacher may have a point, I don’t think it is entirely her fault for working.

You see, Dr. T said that she tries to spend more time with her kid, but it is just that her income is needed by her family. Isn’t that taking care of her family too?

Anyway, the teacher may have a point, but I think her statement was kind of insensitive. After that story, came Dr. T’s enumeration of her working mommy guilt moments – her daughter appearing in a school program with frazzled hair, her daughter crying throughout the whole drive to school without her, and so on. I was deeply touched because as she said, if it weren’t for the income, she would not be working. In a sisterly gesture, she advised me to stay home as well if we can afford it.

Oh well, who doesn’t want to spend time with her children? But just like Dr. T, work-out-of-home moms also find meaning in their jobs. Dr. T mentioned that she loved the exposure her job brought to her. The procedures she performs on her patients (who are mostly foreigners) would not be availed of by common patients in her private practice. This exposure she says enriches her career.

But then again, our country has yet to mature in terms of accepting that some households need dual incomes, or in single parent homes, the mother needs to earn a living. I think teachers need to be more sensitive about stuff like this. And while I am sure, the advice was out of genuine concern, this matter should be handled sensitively. I don’t think every mom has the pleasure and privilege of being able to stay at home. People around them should be sensitive about the reason the mom chooses to work out of the home. and whether it is to pursue a career, or help put food on the table, the thing is there is no point in uttering insensitive statements that just fan the mommy wars.

And this is not a rare story. I remember an office mate – a single mom — who was told by her kid’s teacher that her kid’s behavior in school was in view of her inability to closely supervise her kid, and the kid not having a father figure. My golly, i told myself. What was that teacher thinking??? I think that statement was totally uncalled for.

Well for working mothers, comments like these should just be brushed aside, no matter how hard it is to swallow. As long as we know deep in our hearts that we are doing what is best for our families, then these things should not be taken so seriously.

Anyway, ill be ending this post. When you are not too busy, please drop by my Facebook page and hit the like button so you could receive weekly meal plans and happypinaymommy.com updates straight from your newsfeed.

Leaving you with a video on working moms:

https://happypinaymommy.com/2015/10/13/yummy-and-easy-sandwich-recipes-for-baon/

The post The Travails of Doctor T, a Full-Time Pinay Working Mom appeared first on Happy Pinay Mommy.