Daily Devotional, Nov 15, 2023
3 Bible Verses for Gentler Parenting
"Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord." Ephesians 6:4
Like most things in life, parenting requires a delicate balance of love and firm guidance; honesty and praise; appreciation and encouragement. Fortunately, the bible contains parenting advice meant for all stages of rearing offsprings — from babies, to children, to teenagers, to young adults.
Today’s devotional will veer away from the usual format, to give way to sharing bible passages meant to encourage gentler parenting. In this world where busy is a default for most parents, and overwhelmed could be an understatement, being gentle on kids every single day may become a challenge. For those days when we need inspiration to stay happy and gentle, here are some guide verses from the scriptures:
1. “(Love is not) rude, it does not insist on its own way. It is not irritable or resentful.” (1 Corinthians 13:4). This verse is taken from the same chapter that says the famous line “Love is patient, love is kind.” I would like to emphasize though this fourth verse because as parents we may want to insist on our own way (especially to our teenagers), without thinking that times may have changed, and without considering their situation. We should at least hear them out, and try to be flexible, without of course being too permissive for their detriment.
Another Catch-22 situation is with toddlers and younger kids. Sometimes we insist on our own way and own rules that we forget that they are little people that they could be having a hard time with a certain thing that we expect them to know or do.
The second sentence in the passage that includes the words “irritable” and “resentful” are plausible reminders for us moms that we should control our emotions and find ways to not resent serving our children being irritable with them. For instance, foregoing rest and not eating on time can trigger some of us moms to go T-Rex mode when the kids suddenly act up. Let us catch ourselves before we go on full-blown beastmode, eat on time and get enough sleep, so that we do not take out our hunger and exhaustion on our little people when they suddenly get cranky too.
2. “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” (Philippians 4:8) The bottomline of this passage from the Apostle Paul’s Letter to the Philippians is that we should focus on the positive. Sometimes, we parents get to become hyper critical of our kids, especially the ones pushing young adulthood. We tend to forget that they too have a good side. Before we take out our AK-47 Grade Blabbermouth and “open fire” on our erring teen or tween, let us pause and reflect to think of the good things that they do. Let us remember how they make us proud with the things that they excel in, and what makes us praise them. And then we edit our “scorching speech” and instead preach a better-phrased sermon that could hopefully encourage them to do better next time.
3. “Jesus said, ‘Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.'” (Matthew 19:14). We should see our children the way Jesus sees them. When we see them as tricksters who are out to wear as out, let us remember that our Lord and Savior sees them as rightful inheritors of the Kingdom of God. That should be enough to remind us that they are just being entrusted to us, and that we should be the best and gentlest parent that we can be so that we can accomplish one of the missions the Lord has given us.
Of course gentleness goes both ways, and so to teach our kids to be gentle to us and to others, let us make sure that we bring them to the Lord. We should take older kids to church on Sundays, allow the younger ones to attend Sunday School, pray as a family daily, and intentionally teach them bible-based values every day. It does not need to be a sit-down, tutorial type discussion, but integrating bible lessons in our everyday conversations with them will help Gospel values penetrate their little hearts. Of course, setting an example is the best way to model such reliance to the Lord. If the kids see us prioritizing our walk with the Lord, then they too will most likely pick that up and grow up fearing and loving our Heavenly Father.
At the end of each tiresome parenting day, it is comforting to note that our own Heavenly Father extends the utmost patience to us amateur, earthly parents. So whenever we fail to do our best because of our frailties or mistakes, we should always remember how merciful the Lord is to us. Let us take comfort in Lamentations 3:22-23, and then rise again to a new day of hopefully happy and gentler parenting:
"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
Thank you for reading through our devotional today. I invite you to ponder on Psalm 127:3-5 and Deuteronomy 6:5-9 to dig deeper on today’s topic.
Reflection Question: How do you endeavor to become a good parent? Do you consult the bible for parenting advice?
Conversation with the Lord:Lord Jesus Christ, please guide me in my parenting journey. Give me the confidence to know and hold on to your promises as I raise up the children that you have entrusted to me. Please empower me to follow your guidance and example so that I could raise godly children, and be the best parent you have ordained me to be. Amen.